2 months, 8 days. That’s 1 month and 4 days more then I lasted with Ethan. Two months.
I’ve liked this guy since November. It’s June now.
I’m not going to cry because it’s over, I’m going to smile because it happened.
It’s crazy to think in the past 7 months, that were back to being friends. It took 5 months to finally admit our feelings for each other.
I feel like telling our story.
here I goo.
how did we meet?
We never really met face to face, but we had a lot of mutual friends. Hes a year older than me, and I know a lot of people in his grade. I’m friends with a lot of them. I have a friend named Kira, who was in his grade. Kira has two older brothers. Her oldest brother and my brother were friends. Her other brother and my sister were friends. That’s how Kira and I know each other. Anyways, in the fifth grade, Kira and I were really close. We talked a lot. We told each other things. At the time, she was in grade 6. She told me she was dating this guy named Noah. I eventually saw his face, and recognized who he was because I saw him around and we were in the same hall way in grade 5. I remember they dated a long time. Then Kira told me they broke up. Kira and I have a friend named Eli, (who is also a year older than me) and Eli was like my best friend. When Kira told me they broke up, I asked her why, and she told me that he went to Disneyland over spring break and he found a girl who made him happy, and that he wished she lived in Calgary. He made Kira cry. It did not go down well. That’s how I knew who Noah was. In the sixth grade, we were in the same P.E class. We never talked, but we in of each other because we had each other on iChat. I think we added each other because we saw each other in a group chat once. That’s how I knew who Noah was.
On November. 7 2011, I was on iChat, just looking through my contact list to see who was online. Noah was online. I read his status. It was “Dream as if you’ll forever, and live as if you’ll die today.”
So I thought I would be funny and message him. This is how our conversation goes.
Me: No, dont live as if you’re going to die. I don’t know about you, but I would be crying and saying goodbye to those that I love. I want to be happy Noah, happy.
Him: well those are good points
Me: why thank ya.
Him: but I think you will get more out of life if you live it that way right?
Me: no you would get limited time.
Him: well you do only have one chance
Me: unless you get lucky
Him: ya…. Why you think I should change my status?
Me: yup. It makes me sad.
Him: okay I’ll find another one
Me: lol okay
Him: this could take a while lol
*couple minutes go by, and his status is changed to: life is about laughing and living in good and bad times. Getting through whatever comes our way, looking back and smiling.
Him: what about that one?
Me: I like it. Good job!
Haha that’s how our first actual conversation went. After that we started talking about sports, things like that. I told him I played on the junior volleyball team, and that I had a game the next day. We just continued talking, and got to know each other. It was nice talking to him.
At the time when I first started talking to Noah, I was head over heels for my ex, Ethan. I was also a littl upset at the time because Ethan didn’t like me back.
The next day, I went on to iChat, and I saw a message. It was from Noah. I remember the message was something like “Hey, just wanted to wish you good luck on your game. I’m sure you’ll go great.” Something like that. Or it had to do with my tournament, I don’t quite remember. Anyways, after that message, we started talking every night. Got to know each other, had good talks, shared laughs. He made me forget about Ethan. I started to fall for this guy pretty quickly, but I hid my feelings. We talked everyday. We face timed a couple times. I was really starting to like him.
You know that feeling when you can just tell that this person likes you back? Just the way they talk to you, and tell you things. You can just feel it? Yeah. I felt that with him.
We eventually started texting each other. Everyday. For hours on end. I would talk to this guy. For hours. About the most randomest things. I really started to like him.
I was supposed to leave on November. 29 2011 to go to Philippines for a month and a half. I wouldn’t be home until January. 15 2012.
On my last Thursday at school before I left, I had electives. I was in the same elective as Kira. Kira and I did this project together, and I was telling how I started talking to Noah a lot. I had Noah’s number, but he didn’t have mine. This is how mine and Kiras conversation went:
Me: yeah I’ve been talking to him a lot.
Kira: what where?
Me: on iChat
Me: every day.
Kira: wow when I try to talk to him, he never answers. What a jerk.
At the time I was telling Kira a funny story. Anyways, after school that day, I went to my friend ally’s house. Kira and ally ride the same bus. So Kira and I had an idea to prank text Noah since he didn’t have my number. It was really funny. After that, Kira and Noah started talking again.
Anyways, my last day was Monday, November. 28. That day I got a lot of hugs from people, I a lot of goodbyes. November 28 was also the day that Noah and I shared out first hug. That night, we talked on iChat. As usual.
He was telling me that he was going to miss me, and that he would still send over messages when he could. The next day, I left for Philippines.
While i was in Philippines, I really liked Noah. I missed him, and I really missed talking to him. He did what he said he would. He sent messages when he could, I did the same.
Before I knew it, I was back home. Noah texted me, and told me to text him when I could. Right when I got home, I was supposed to go to schools the very next day. He told me he missed talking to me and I missed him soo much.
When I got to school, I didn’t see Noah until my second day of school, and I saw him for like 5 seconds. I told my friend Joelle that I liked him. Joelle is also a year older then me. She gave me this weird look and this weird vibe. I knew something was up. Joelle was in my elective, and we were working on a project so that’s when she told Emma what was wrong. She refused to tell me, and I guess if it was that Noah had a girlfriend and she said no. Since Emma knew, and that joelle wasn’t going to tell me, I went a little father down the hall (we were working in the hall) to sit beside kira. Joelle quickly came over to me to drag me back to where Emma, her and I were sitting. She literally dragged me. I told her I was giving her the silent treatment until she told me what was wrong. Emma and Joelle both told me Noah had a girlfriend. I was immidatly crushed. I was so upset. I asked who, and to my surprise, I heard the name Kira. I was even mo crushed. I had to see Kira every other day, spend an hour and thirty minutes with her, knowing that she was dating the guy I was head over heels for.
Noah was the first guy I liked since I dated Ethan. I was single for a whole year until I started liking Noah. He was special.
Anyways, after I figured that out, I told Emma to tell Noah that my phone broke because i didn’t want to talk to him. (Emma and Noah ride the same bus.)
I was so upset because I just didn’t understand how he could act like he liked me, but then I leave and he gets a girlfriend 5 days after. I was crushed.
I felt bad for lying to Noah so I texted him and told him my phone wasn’t broken, I was just upset, I never told him that I knew that Kira and him were dating until like February or march. He was
Retry surprised that I knew.
So many times I wanted to tell Noah I liked him. So many times.
Anyways, we continued to talk everyday, and since Kira is my close friend, I decided to push my feelings away for Noah. I still liked Ethan. A lot.
So months went by, and in March, I was back to being head over heels for Ethan. Noah was hitting a rough patch with Kira. He was thinking of breaking up with her because their relationship was going no where. And in march, he did break up with her. Terrible timing because that was when I was telling Ethan how I felt. I was telling Noah (we were super super close. He was like my new best guy friend.) how i felt for Ethan, and what I would say exactly to him(this was after Noah broke up with Kira. It all happened the same day.)
After I told Noah what I would Ethan, he said something like “you really like him don’t you?” and I said yeah. And then he said something like “yeah, I’m trying to imagine what he would say. I don’t know why he doesn’t/ wouldn’t/ isn’t like you.”
Right when he said that I knew he liked me back.
This wasn’t the first time that I liked Ethan and it wasn’t the first time I spilled my feelings out to him. I’ve done it several times. He still doesn’t like me back. So I officially gave up on him.
About a week after, makenna and Emma kept on pushing me to tell Noah that I liked him. They even called him over to talk to me at school a couple times.
One night we were texting and he was asking me what that was about. I kept telling him it was nothing, then I asked him if he wanted to talk at school.
The next day, (I think it was a Wednesday) we talked during lunch. We went outside, and sat at these tables outside. This one guy who we both dont know made it really awkward, and kept asking questions like “do you two like each other?” “do you guys wanna be boyfriend/ girlfriend?” we both kept saying no. That was the day I originally planned on telling Noah I liked him. I didn’t end up telling him. This was the week before spring break. Spring break was two weeks long.
So on Thursday, I told makenna and Emma that I wanted to tell Noah that I liked him. Makenna came with me to go find Noah (this was during lunch) so I could tell him. We found him, and I flaked on telling him. Later that night, we were talking (obviously) and I told him that I wanted to talk to him the next day during lunch. He told me that he had something to tell me. So the next day, which was Friday, the last day before spring break, during lunch, Noah and I hung out.
I remember like we were joking around a lot, and it took me a while to finally tell him that I liked him.
Near the end of lunch, we sat on the benches in front of the gym and I told him.
I said something like: so back n November, when we first started talking, I had this crush on you. And then I left. And when I came back, I liked Ethan, and you were dating Kira. And now that Ethan doesn’t like me back, and you’re single, I still have that crush on you. Nothing has changed.
Something like that.
And he told me that he liked me back.
Then the bell rang. And we had to go to class. But we talked at the end of the day. We hugged.
I was so happy. So happy.
Then we were talking and he was being so sweet.
And then we didn’t want to wait two weeks until we could see each other again. So, we made plans to see a movie together on Monday. There was a blizzard on Monday (I live in Canada, it’s totally normal to have snow in march.) so our plans didnt work out.
So we made plans for Tuesday.
Emma and I were planning to hang out on Tuesday. Emma’s parents at divorced, and Emma’s dad lives in the same neighbor hood as Noah. So Emma and I were planning to just stay at her dads. Emma was going to invite this guy that she liked to the movies, while I invited Noah.
See how I thought everything was meant to be?
So on Tuesday, I went over to Emma’s dads house, and Emma’s guy bailed on her, and went to go see a different movie. So Emma ended up being a third wheel on mine and Noah’s date. We hung out after the movie and Noah held my hand. Made me feel do special.
We walked around the mall just a little bit, then we had to go because Emma’s dad had to go to a meeting.
Then we were talking to Emma’s dad, and he said we could invite Noah over. So we did. Noah came over. And we went downstairs, and me and Noah sat the couch together. He put his arm around me, and his other arm around me waist, and my head fit perfectly into his neck. Everything felt so perfect in that moment. Everything. I was so happy. Now at this point, we weren’t officially “boyfriend/girlfriend.” it was march. 27. The day he asked me to be his girlfriend.
Then we just sat there and talked. Felt to natural to be in his arms. I have never done that with a guy before.
Then he went home. He came over the next day only for a little bit. Then Emma came over to my house fr the night. As usual Noah and I started texting.
Then I went back to Emma’s house, and Noah came over again. And cuddled. I loved it.
Then we saw the hunger games together.
We had a lot of dates, and everything was going perfect.
After a bit, we started saying “i love you.” we started hanging out at lunch just us two. Everything was perfect. We were both happy.
It was until like a couple weeks ago that we had our first real fight. We fought for two days. Things went down hill.
We fixed things though, and for like a week or so we were happy.
When we hung out yesterday, he had his hand around my waist, he told me he loved me, held my hand in front of all of his friends. Even when I let go when I saw his friends coming towards us, he pulled my hand back and held it tightly. He hugged me.
And then today, we didn’t hang out at lunch, and right before electives, he broke up with me. What happened exactly?
Well I went into the library to put my laptop back. I saw him. When I was walking out of the library Nik J. Told me that Noah needed to talk to me. I said okay, and when I came out of the library Noah was standing there, and he asked if we could talk. So I said okay. He asked me where I was during lunch, and I told him where. Then he said okay, there’s something I need to tell you. I said okay, then this is how it went.
Him: I don’t like you that way anymore.
Me: aree you kidding?
So I walked away. I had to get to class, and I was on the verge of tears.
I always walk away when I’m crying because I don’t want him to see my upset. And he understands that. I was so heart broken.
That’s how it went.
Were still talking as I speak. We’re friends, and we’re okay.
Love is a funny thing.
This break up may really effect me soon, but for now, I’m just
-Dealing with it.